• New? START HERE
    • About
    • Contact
  • Personal Growth
    • Nourish Your Soul
    • Minimalism
    • Money
  • Book's I've Read
    • Reading List
    • Book Reviews
  • Pillow Talk
    • Real Talk
    • Let’s Discuss
    • Poetry
  • Travel

Pages

Instagram Twitter YouTube Bloglovin

Channel Malia - personal growth to live consciously



I’m sharing one of the golden things I’ve learnt from guided meditation. Here's exactly how you can take steps to train your mind to pivot from negative thoughts.

Have you ever had a bad day where one bad thing happens after another? I call this the negative domino effect. You stub your toe and then you feel sorry for yourself. You send out messages to the world that you want to feel sorry for yourself once more. The universe responds and you cut your hand and end up in A&E for hours. Then you complain about having to wait so long and so on and so forth.

The more you dwell on a bad feeling the more you become a victim to that feeling. The more you react to that feeling you’re stimulating that negative energy and causing that domino effect to happen.

If you believe that things just happen to you and that the world is a terrible place then you’ll never be happy. Bad things don’t just happen to you, you accept them allow them in with welcoming arms and then bask in your troubles.

Huntington Beach, California
Enter meditation

Meditation has been one of the most difficult yet rewarding things I’ve done. One of the easiest way to get into it is to close your eyes. Now imagine that you’re drifting out of your body and you’re looking at yourself sitting there cross-legged on the floor with all that pain. 

Looking at yourself as if in the third person allows you to start that initial step of separating yourself from your pain.

As you watch yourself in the third person you feel less and less of what you were feeling before. It is almost like that other you is suffering and you are simply an onlooker.

Pivot

Most people that complain don’t want to do anything to fix their problem. They just want to complain. Don’t drown in their negative ocean. Run or if you can’t pivot.

It is actually much easer to get rid of negativity coming from other people. You can either remove them from your life or if that’s not a choice you can pivot the direction of your thoughts as soon as they start spewing negative words. I wrote a whole post on how to deal with difficult people here.

Whenever someone says or does something negative change the direction of your thoughts even if it means thinking about ice cream and sunny days. Don’t let their words start a negative domino effect in your head.

It is important to remember that although on the outside it looks like they are having a go at you in reality they're having a rough battle with themselves. People judge and berate you based on their own limitations or pain points. Once you know this you’ll find it easier to pivot. Let them bask in their troubles, you carry on smiling.



Be present

The simple practice of meditation I’ve shared allows you to be in the present moment without the worries you may have about tomorrow. There are so many more facets I can’t wait to share with you.

My point is if you worry about the future you can never be truly present and then when you get there to that future you were worrying about you continue to worry further into your future. One day soon you’ll be gone. 

A really good example of this was during my final year at university things at home weren’t so great but I allowed that negativity to stream into my great time at university until graduation day. 

I was determined that no matter what was going on at home that once I wore my graduation gown it was game face on or should I say mind on the present moment?

It was the hardest thing to do. My graduation has become one of the most happiest and memorable days in my life. There is nothing more empowering than being able to switch from the victim mindset to a positive one. Being positive takes a lot more energy, effort and courage and people will bring you down for that but you must continue to meditate, pivot and be present.

The only power we have over our lives is our attitude. When you choose not to react to the inevitable storm you hold the power. Trying to fight a storm is a battle you know you will lose and even worse, complaining about the storm will have you in that state of mind forever. 

Meditation creates awareness and when you become aware of yourself you know when and how to pivot and be present. You can catch yourself when you react to something, when you want to change something about yourself or get rid of something that no longer serves you.

To end I will leave you with a video I made about mindfulness and positivity and this quote.

An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship. Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down unless you allow it to get inside you - Goi Nasu
Share
Tweet
Pin
Share
No comments


Don't 'deal' with them at all.

Difficult people have their own internal issues that you will never be able to fix. Your honest intentions will be twisted and misconstrued because of the illness in their mind that has at this point become terminally toxic. The very fact that they're channeling their anger or trying to start an argument with you proves that.

There's a quote I really like and remind myself of when I am faced with difficult. I'll paraphrase. Despite how open, loving and peaceful you attempt to be, people can only meet you as deeply as they've met themselves.

They're not angry at you even though it seems that way. They're hurting inside for their own deep rooted insecurities and failures. They lack in the cognitive skills to take a step back, look in the mirror or reassess their feelings.

Don't let that be you by responding. Too often I have let other people's issues affect me. The secret is not to react as tempting as it may seem. I very quickly learnt that happy people do not hurt or blame others for their misfortunes.

You may be blamed for something constantly but that's just their twisted way of looking for a solution. A misguided attempt at feeling better. They want to channel their misery on someone and the closest thing they can find is you. 

It will take some time but once you stop responding they will too. When toxicity reaches to death they will even search for reasons to be difficult even when you don't react. The best way is to rid these types of people from your life. If right now you can't you have to find a way to ignore and align yourself with your higher self for your own mental wellbeing. I've learnt to pivot the direction of my thoughts from negative (the ones blaring out to me from the angry person) to positive. I smile. I change direction and continue my daily task as the continue their angry tirade.

At the end of the day I know they are feeling negative energy while I bask in my happiness. Know that your happiness is yours. Nothing can take that away. Here's something I was thinking about while standing by the sea.



Remember that you are not the problem even though it may seem like it to them on then surface. They may even criticise and berate everything that you do. That is another sign that they are unhappy with themselves.

What a powerful feeling it is to know that you are in control of your own happiness. They have their own issues you know you cannot help them with, whether it be failures, rejection or jealousy. While continuing to lead your life the amazing way you want will be an example to them.


Share
Tweet
Pin
Share
No comments

Off the shoulder or bardot style tops and dresses have made a huge comeback and I'm so excited about this. Last year it was the 90s strappy camis and now we have bardots. I love it when things make a comeback only because there's a huge supply of the style. I'm not one for following trends but this...this was different. I love my shoulders so showing off my collar bones is my favourite thing about this style.

The red floral isn't in your face. This is the perfect summer midi dress you could wear both on holiday and in the summer even for your supermarket dash. You could wear it to a wedding, a birthday or a summer date.


I love that it's so very light and airy. It folds beautifully in my beach bag and I was able to wear it again without creasing. This is the epitome of summer. I think it's already made it as my summer dress of 2017. Does anyone have that? An item of clothing that completely epitomises the entire season because you wear it all of the time?

The slit arms come down to a tie. I'm not usually a fan of the cuffed wrists but this works so beautifully and is super comfy. You could even wear it covering your shoulders.



On this day in particular I made an effort to wear makeup though neutral compared to the day before as I was meeting some friends of friends. Don't you just love it when you can warm up to new people really easily and generally have a great night. We stayed up until midnight talking love, babies and life over pizza and drinks while I not so discreetly took off my makeup and got comfy. I have to do that when we're staying in.

I was actually falling asleep on the sofa until they left. Though I would like to add that this was by far one of my favourite days on my trip.

Share
Tweet
Pin
Share
No comments

Like many girls I have been lusting after a Triangl bikini for the longest time ever. In this post I'm going to review the Triangl bikini sizing for a big bust and and small back, shipping to the UK and what I think of this set. 

When a holiday to California came up I just had to cave in. I had the balconette bikini in the colour Blue Crush on my wishlist for a good two years so you can only imagine my excitement at finally owning one. I've road tested it so feel free to call me your guinea pig.

I love the contrasting highlighter yellow against the blue. Have I not mentioned how blue is my favourite colour, like ever?

This colour combination with the white is a smart choice especially when you know you're going to get a tan or if you have yellow/pink undertones in your skin. This colour is a dream on me.



I wore it to my recent visit to Santa Monica beach and the neoprene makes this bikini perfect for getting in the water. The material is nice and firm. 

I didn't enjoy sun bathing in it as much as I loved getting in the water with it. This would be a worthwhile investment if you love to swim. This is something I don't think any other reviewer has said about the Triangl bikinis but when I'm lying on the beach I don't really want to be caged in firm neoprene.

Sizing

I got a size S++. For sizing reference I'm a 30DD in most places and 32D at Victoria's Secret. I was a bit worried as I have a small framed rib cage but a bigger bust. I still think I could have done better with an XS++ but they don't stock that size for this particular bikini.

Shipping

Shipping was fast. It took two days to ship out and four days to get to me once shipped. There was a standard $20 charge at checkout for international delivery. 

Here's a link to all the balconnet bikinis they currently have in stock. I hope this review has been helpful. Do leave your comments in the disqus comment section down below.
Share
Tweet
Pin
Share
No comments
Newer Posts
Older Posts

About

About

Hey, I'm Malia. I share my passion for intentional living, books and travel. I am a British expat living between the England and Virginia. I moved for love and also share my personal life and travels around America. Find here positivity, personal growth and deep discussions to live consciously.

FOLLOW BY EMAIL

Popular

  • Unpopular Drugstore Must Haves
  • How To Spot A Good Investment Piece
  • What They Should Teach You At School
  • 4 Ways To Look Good Without Trying
  • 9 Things I Wish I Knew Before Starting Youtube

Blog Archive

  • ►  2019 (5)
    • ►  April (1)
    • ►  March (1)
    • ►  February (1)
    • ►  January (2)
  • ►  2018 (20)
    • ►  December (3)
    • ►  November (1)
    • ►  October (2)
    • ►  September (3)
    • ►  August (3)
    • ►  June (1)
    • ►  May (1)
    • ►  April (1)
    • ►  March (2)
    • ►  February (1)
    • ►  January (2)
  • ▼  2017 (10)
    • ►  October (1)
    • ►  August (1)
    • ►  June (1)
    • ▼  May (4)
      • How To Deal With Negative Thoughts
      • How To Deal With Difficult People
      • How To Wear Off The Shoulder Trend
      • Triangl Bikini Review UK Sizing and Shipping
    • ►  March (1)
    • ►  February (1)
    • ►  January (1)
  • ►  2016 (22)
    • ►  December (2)
    • ►  October (2)
    • ►  September (1)
    • ►  August (3)
    • ►  July (2)
    • ►  June (1)
    • ►  May (2)
    • ►  April (2)
    • ►  March (2)
    • ►  February (2)
    • ►  January (3)
  • ►  2015 (11)
    • ►  October (1)
    • ►  May (2)
    • ►  April (1)
    • ►  March (1)
    • ►  February (3)
    • ►  January (3)
  • ►  2014 (2)
    • ►  December (1)
    • ►  October (1)
  • ►  2013 (2)
    • ►  July (1)
    • ►  January (1)
  • ►  2012 (10)
    • ►  November (1)
    • ►  September (1)
    • ►  August (1)
    • ►  July (2)
    • ►  June (2)
    • ►  May (2)
    • ►  April (1)
Malia Choudhury 2012 - 2017. Powered by Blogger.
FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM

Created with by ThemeXpose