The Problem With Saying I CAN'T

by - 06 January

I CAN'T is self-sabotage. By saying I CAN'T you are ruling out the possibilities, and as crazy as it may sound at the time, sometimes even the possibility of I CAN.

I CAN'T is safe, if not pessimistic. 

Which leads us to the problem with the optimistic approach of I CAN. 

I CAN is often viewed as brave, if not irrational.
With, I CAN, you'll give up if you fail at the first hurdle.

I'LL TRY has got to be the worst out of the three. It is basically "I'm kidding myself" or "definite failure is too much to come to terms with" Sitting on the fence can be more comfortable than I CAN'T. 

The trick is to keep at it. When to give up you ask? I'm not going to be ridiculously optimistic about it and say that you should never give up. That would be just as dangerously counter-productive as saying I CAN.


Instead, I'm going to tell you to GIVE UP. Your road to successes should instead be a case of elimination. Simply put, give up on things that no longer serve you. Look around you. Yes, right now wherever you are sitting. There's so much clutter. How much of it do you really need? 

  • If you are sitting in your bedroom ask yourself if you really need that bedside lamp.
  • If you're in your living room are the tall vases taking up too much space? 
  • If you're on the train did you need to bring everything you have in your bag/pockets.
Similarly there's so much clutter in our minds. That clutter clouds our judgement of the possibility of I CAN. Let me show you how:

You could have replaced that bedside lamp to have space for your tablet from which you listen to motivational podcast in the comfort of your bed. You could use the extra vase space for your daily yoga practice. And so and so forth.

Extend these questions to other aspects of your life. Do you really need to carry on with your Law degree? Are you holding onto a relationship that is just draining? Are you hanging out with people who don't reflect you anymore? 

When we dare to ask ourselves these questions we are opening up more possibilities and reducing the problem with I CAN'T, I CAN and I'LL TRY.

Next week we'll be discussing Phase 2: Eliminate so you can make space to welcome the new and sometimes terrifying.

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